Ahhh! Get the PleaseMen! It's the School Bus!
by SugarHi Marauders
Summary: Thirteenyear old James Potter is terrified of school buses. Not only does he include the Marauders and Lily in his quest to ban school buses, but also the Mayor and the Prime Minister of England? Trust us, you won’t regret reading it….and then REVIEW!


**A/N: This story was written by Cally and Sheri. This WHOLE STORY is based on our current lives and our fear of school buses. A school bus did actually try and run us over…**

**_Disclaimer: None of the characters are ours only Jo's except for the ones you don't recognize. So all of you fat, hairy school-bus driving lawyers BACK OFF! We have a spork…and we're NOT afraid to use it. (You'll figure out what we mean later on.)_**

Ahh! Get the Please-men! It's the school bus!

By: Cally and Sheri with inspiration from Trish

**Chapter 1: The Nightmare That Began It All**

_Standing in a dark alleyway, James was terrified. He had his wand out getting ready for the worst, when…there it was._

_The sound of a moving vehicle. A BIG moving vehicle. It took a while, but then James recognized the noise that brought back so many bad memories._

_It was a school bus. Not any school bus…a **yellow** school bus._

_He couldn't take it anymore._

_He screamed and squealed saying "NOT THE SCHOOL BUS! PLEASE NOT THE SCHOOL BUS! OH NO! The big headlights and big, fat, hairy driver! IT'S TOO MUCH! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! GOOO AWAAAAAYYY!"_

Sirius Black watched his best friend squeal and scream stuff about yellow school buses while he was eating his chocolate ice cream bar.

**5 minutes later**

Sirius, figuring he had enough entertainment and blackmail, decided to wake up James.

"Oy. James! Wake up! There aren't any school buses here!"

James woke up and sat up quickly. Once he realized there wasn't a yellow school bus, he calmed down a bit. It was just a dream. There was no scary bus driver after him…Or was there?

"Hey Sirius." James said nervously.

"Are you sure there isn't a bus hidden in here somewhere?" James started walking around his bedroom and looked all over the place expecting to see a scary bus and is driver waiting for him.

"What's with you and yellow school buses! They're not even scary!" Sirius exclaimed to the terrified James.

"Hey, do you want some pancakes?" Sirius asked suddenly

"Yeah alright!"

"And the two of them happily hopped to the kitchen as if the bus nonsense never happened.

"Hello boys!" Gabriella Potter greeted them as they walked in the kitchen/dining room with two plates piled with a stack of pancakes no less than three feet high. She put them on the table and the boys immediately began devouring it.

Seven minutes later, when they were done eating, Sirius decided to use the blackmail he obtained that morning.

"Mrs. Potter, can we take the Knight BUS to the Leaky Cauldron today?" He asked glancing at James with an evil smirk.

"Okay, just as long as you don't go anywhere beyond Diagon Alley. I won't be able to come with you because I have to do some work….James are you okay?" She now saw that James looked terrified at the thought of the Leaky Cauldron.

_What is he scared of…the Knight Bus?_ She thought and decided to ask.

"James, what's wrong? You look like you're scared of something."

"The Knight Bus." He whispered quietly, and then shuddered.

_I KNEW IT! Oh yea, go motherly instincts!_

And unbeknownst to her, she started doing a little victory dance.

James stopped shuddering and Looked at his mom along with Sirius.

"Are you _happy_ that he's scared of the Knight Bus?" Sirius asked incredibly.

"NOOOO!" Gabriella said with, what Sirius says to be true, shifty eyes.

"Where did you get an idea like that?" Gabriella asked with a humongous smile.

"The fact that you were dancing, and when I said---" James started but was interrupted by Gabriella saying

"Just get out, will ya?" pointing to the window unknowingly.

James and Sirius looked at her with scared faces but started walking towards the window. Sirius stopped a foot in front of the window while James started opening the window.

Sirius turned to Gabriella with a somber expression saying "Is there no other way to settle this?"

Gabriella tuned to look at where she was pointing.

When she realized where she was pointing, she chuckled to herself and redirected her finger to point towards the door.

Simultaneously, the boys went "ohhhhhh" and left the house.

They proceeded to walk out the door. As soon as they did, Gabriella did the same small little dance she did before.

Unfortunately for her, the boys walked back into the kitchen while she was in the middle of her little dance.

They stopped mid-step and stared at her with wide eyes.

"Oh um…err…what are you doing back here?" Gabriella asked.

"It was too cold outside…" James said still looking at her strangely.

"Alright...how much will it cost me to get you two out of the house?" Gabriella asked pulling out her bag.

"Jeez, thanks we feel wanted now…but 50 galleons."

"50!" She screeched.

"25?"

"Deal." She took the gold coins out of her bag and handed it over to the boys.

"Now…of you go. Give mum some peace and quiet." She said with a smile.

The boys wore identical grins and pretended to walk out in a huff. Gabriella shook her head as she turned around.

"I ain't gonna wait here all day for you, you know!" The man said impatiently.

"James, come ON!" Sirius said trying to drag James up the steps.

"NO! You can't make me! I'm not going to do it! NOOO!" James yelled.

"Mate…it's the Knight Bus! It's not going to---"

"Why the heck aren't we moving? I'm on a strict schedule here mister!" A boy said coming up to the front.

"Moony?" James asked.

"MOONY!" Sirius yelled.

"Ah…that's why…" Remus turned to give the driver a pitying look and said "I forgive you for being slow." And without noticing the driver's nostrils flaring, waved the guys to come inside the bus.

James, forgetting his fear of buses, followed Sirius.

"MOONY!" James yelled again as if he'd just seen him.

Remus John Lupin turned around expectantly and asked "yes?"

"What are you doing here!"

"Err…going to Diagon Alley?"

"Oh…ME TOO!"

"Yay?" Remus said with a confused expression. James just grinned.

"LEAKY CAULDRON!" The driver up front shouted.

"Come on." Remus said standing up. James and Sirius did too and followed Remus to the front of the bus. And as they got out, James gave the driver a filthy look, who gladly returned it.

After buying all the supplies and books they need and staring at the new broom, they decided to stop at Florean Fortescue's for some ice cream.

Sirius barged into the room yelling "YES, YES! WE ARE HERE! Hold the applause please. Its' not necessary." With his hands up in the air he walked in towards the counter with Remus and James going in after him rolling their eyes.

Yet one little boy was still clapping…one by the name of

"PETER! WHAT ARE _YOU_ DOING HERE?" James yelled running over to him.

"Uh…eating ice cream?" Peter said uncertainly.

"ME TOO!" James and Sirius said at the same time.

Sirius and Peter then got into an involved discussion of ice cream flavors and which ones are the best. James and Remus just stood there shaking their heads. Unfortunately for them, they are very big spazes.

THWACK! James hit the wall with his head because he was shaking his head so quickly.

Remus shook his head at James along with shaking his head at Sirius and Peter. The result? A very dizzy Remus Lupin.

Peter and Sirius stopped their conversation to stare at James and Remus, both of whom were rubbing their heads in pain, and started cracking up.

_**5 Minutes Later**_

When Sirius and Peter and the rest of the shop were done laughing with tears in they're eyes, they decided to leave and head back to James' house.

"AHAHAHAHA! THAT WAS HYSTERICAL!" Sirius cried loudly.

"HEY! Keep it down will ya?" Said a fat, hairy man coming from a store.

James' eyes widened, and he stammered a bit until he finally yelled out "STUPID SCHOOL BUS DRIVER!" And ran the other way at full speed.

Remus, Peter and the fat, hairy man watched James run away with a shocked expression. But Sirius just turned to the man and said "Oh, don't worry we'll deal with him. He's just has a little fear for fat and hairy men." And ran after James.

The man had a look saying he was highly insulted since he was called 'fat and hairy' by a young misfit.

Remus turned to the man and said "I'm sorry. My friend never watches his tongue. Bye!" And went after Sirius and James.

Peter said "But it's true you know," to the man before he ran after the rest of his friends.

The fat and hairy man just stared after them and felt slightly terrified of the new generation.

"Alright boys. Be good. Try and stay out of trouble…or at least refrain from doing anything that will cause me to send another howler. Please?" Gabriella asked.

The four boys looked at each other, grinned but nodded nevertheless.

She smiled and gave each a hug b before they went through Platform 9¾.

Once they got through, many girls and fans smiled sweetly and waved at the Marauders, and Sirius gladly returned them.

But James had a different idea…

"LILY!" James yelled to a redheaded person who had her back faced towards them.

She turned around slowly muttering "Aw man!"

James ran up to her and yelled "WHAT ARE _YOU_ DOING HERE?"

"Err…going to Hogwarts." She said slowly.

"Oh. My. Goodness. ME TOO!" James said excitedly.

"Darn it. I thought you moved far, far away…"

And thus began the Marauders' and Lily's third year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

**A/N: Did you like? There will be more chapters coming. We've got the whole story planned out…it's just the problem of putting it all in words…but we'll update as soon as we can. BUT. We are going to update 'Sugar Quills, Anyone?' before we update this story. If you liked it….then REVIEW! And if you didn't like it…STILL REVIEW!**


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